wla na ko maipose eh...

Tell me…

If I ask you to stay will you smile and assure me that I need not worry for you will never leave me…or will you turn your back on me and say I’m sorry as you walk away…

When I was born, I was alone and all I have was my loving family…but when I entered the school I met many people which became a special part of my life…I had many friends and also got myself into trouble because of others who were a certified “pasaways”…

In grade school I had crushes… pero infatuation lang yun, as in I’ve never felt love before, until I entered high school where I met somebody…
Somebody who I never thought would change my mind about having to love somebody…

It was simple day for me, naglalakad papunta sa classroom, kukuha ng gamit sa locker, makikipag-tsismisan sa friends…a typical day, at hindi ko naiisip na sa araw pa lang yun e magbabago ang pananaw ko pagdating sa buhay teenager…

I checking on my books at recess time when a friend came rushing to me,

“friend…I think I’m in-love!!!”

I was shocked by how she approached me, and yet I was able to react right…

“ha-ha-ha…as if naman totoo yang Sinasabi mo?”

I teased her as I laughed hard,

“di ba no.1 man-hater ka? Paano ka maiinlove…nagpapatawa ka ba?”

she frowned at me and then pushed me slightly…she smiled as if somebody tickled her from the back…

“ay ang landi!...ano ka ba...ayan time na tuloy hindi ako nakapag-aral..bad trip ka naman o…”

the bell rang and our other classmates came into the room, I sat beside Rina, a very talkative gal, she won’t stop talking until she would be ask to shut up…so having her as a seatmate was a torture, I have to evacuate my seat and find other place where I can be peaceful and write my stories…

I saw my close friend Len and the chair next to her was vacant so I went to seat there almost the whole day, except our homeroom period for I will be scolded, and that I don’t want to happen…

Whenever I will sit there, I will notice our guy classmate, who was always quiet and never talked to anyone…I would always make parinig to him that…

“sana naman magsalita ka na…”

but he will only smile at me and then won’t look at me again..

that went on for about 2 months and when our adviser decided to change our seat plan I prayed that I will be seating next to him…but God seems to be upset with me so he made me sit far from him…-teka lang, during those times I’m not yet sure about how I feel about him, I just miss his smile, yun lang…-

in the next quarter I finally found out who he was in my life, I felt something different for him and it made me feel a little shy when he will come to me to ask help for an assignment or something…wow naman nagsasalita na siya…but soon I found out that my friend was in love with him and it made things complicated for me…now I don’t know how to act around him, I don’t know if I still have to smile when I see him or should I start forgetting about him and my feelings for him…- kasi naman sa dinami-dami ng mamahalin niya bat yung mahal ko pa…-


but it didn’t stop there…someone later told me that he likes my friend as well as she liked him!, - ano ba yan naglolokohan ba kami ng tadhana ko?-

and then what made it more masakit ang magulo was that he started to court my friend…alam ko hindi nya alam so ano karapatan kong magreklamo di ba?...

oh, I forgot before the courting thing, something really panget happened… it was disco night and I told myself that I what I feel for him is just infatuation, but my mistake was I already told Len about my feelings for him and she really thinks it’s a serious problem…me my best friend decided to set her up with a dance with him, and we went to him and asked him to ask her to dance with him, he agreed and when he took her hand the creeps went up my spine making my eyes teary… -teka lang ang sabi ko kinilabutan ako, e bat naiyak na ko?...-

as they swayed in the romantic tune of the song, Len also found the scene ‘kakilakilabot’ and went to me to ask if I’m okay, but because of her question the tears made there way out of my eye-lids…
Len hugged me and told me it’s okay, and when Jheng also went to give me a hug I soon found myself crying like a baby… -nagtataka nga ako kung bakit ganun eh…-

Now after that I never tried to talk to him or even text him…and when classes resumed I found out that my friend actually answered him ‘yes’ the day after the disco happened…-kita mo sabi ko na nga ba malandi yung babaeng yun eh…joke lang…hehe-

I didn’t seem to notice that he existed in this world after the heart break he caused me…and he seemed to felt my coldness to him and started asking me what’s wrong, the nerve to ask!...oh well, remember now, he doesn’t know how you feel okay?...so whenever he would ask me, I would just try to give him my sweetest smile and say

“wala…bat naman ako magagalit sayo di ba?...wag mo na lang ako pansinin…geh, wala pa ako assignment eh…”

yeah, that’s always my answer to him…I guess he really didn’t care about me…-bakit nga ba siya magke-care di ba?...asa ka pa…-

then February came rushing in…it was a busy time for all of us, but it seem to me that time seemed to slow down and all that was happening was slowly starting to get a little complicated for all of us. Dagdagan pa nang palapit na JS PROM wow, grabe ang stress…practice dito practice doon, lumalabas ang pimple ko sa hirap…

I thought twice on going to the PROM for I was afraid that it might be the worst night I could ever experience but my mom had tlkaed me on attending…-nagsisisi nga ako eh, dapat talga hindi na lang ako umattend…-

During the prom night I was having the time of my life as I talkes to my friends and there he goes to ruin my night, he asked my friend for a dance, they danced in the middle of the floor like it was theirs… -ha!, akala mo kung sinong maganda at gwapo o!..mga panget!-

From a distance I tried my best to stop myself from crying, and buti na lang a senior friend of mine saved me from the nightmare…he asked me to dance with him and all I did was to laugh because of his jokes…-sana nga siya na lang minahal ko eh…kaso di pwede eh…

The night ended without him noticing that I had dressed up in a gown and had my face maked-up just for that night and there he go to ruin it all…
-bakit kasi ang hirap magmahal eh Pwede namang bukas limot mo na siya bat kailangan pang pahirapan ang sarili eh…-

I was an honor student so I was included on taking up the exams early and he was unfortunately not one of us so he was going to take the test twice…I didn’t let him know how I feel, and he really don’t need to know…-mas mahirap pa yun…bruha kasi yung kaibigan kong yun eh!-

The school year ended, I didn’t talked to him nor texted him to say hello or kamustahin siya…what for? Ginagago ko lang sarili ko…

I went to the school to get my report card and the pictures which was taken during the Recognition day. I never heard from him and even managed to at least forget half of what had happened during the past school year.
When I entered the gate, bad luck was surely on that day, he was the first person I saw and he even had the guts to smile at me, so to hide all the sadness I smiled back…but deep inside me I wanted to slap him and sasabihin ko kung gaano ko siya kamahal, even after all he had done to me…

When I asked my friend how the two of them was, yup, friends pa rin kami after it all,di ko naman kasi sinabi sa kanya eh…isa pa baka mainsecure lang siya sa kin no…hehe…
She told me that she broke up with him and when she was about to tell me the reason our teacher came so she didn’t got the chance to tell me…


Another school year was about to start and all I had in mind was to find another guy to love, somebody who will not hurt me and instead treasure me…
But the first and second day wasn’t what I expected…he was not yet enrolled and my heart went PUMP…PUMP…PUMP… did he transferred? Or is he going to stop schooling? How was he? Does he still love my friend or shook off the idea that they will reunite, because according to my friend it will be impossible...-sana nga…hehe, umaasa pa kasi ako eh…-

On the third day I was sitting with my friends in a bench and their he he was walking towards us…I looked at him and when he looked back at me I felt my face turned red so I looked away instantly…

The next three weeks was so cold between the both of us…
Then we planned on talking, to settle things between us but it will only turn out wasted for we still haven’t talked until the other day…
And it was just yesterday where we really talked…I sat beside him and tried to be a good conversationalist…but he kept on turning his face away from me and then finally he faced me and told me that…

“ I…Love…you…yet it can’t be…”

and his face turned red and our heads started to get close…

tell me could this really be happening?...

NOW…I’m here relating this to you and before you start to think of anything stupid, baka kung ano na iniisip mo ha…uunahan na kita okay?...


This is simply a joke, asa kang mangyayari ‘to?...
Hehehe….
Joke,joke,joke!!!!!