amazed

i just read a journal, and guess what, im actually jealous, jealous not of someone but of the time. i wish i met her way before, not just now but years ago, maybe that way i won't be thinking that what we have is just for a while. i dont even want to think that we already have it, but i'd be happy to think that in a way i am special to someone, not just a friend at least but someone who makes her smile.

im afraid, not of falling in love but of getting hurt. i've used this blog mainly for practicing my grammar and writing skill, but now i'd like to use this to take it all out.

im in love, but not to the usual kind, im still not certain if i can say this loud, but im inlove, im not sure if this is really it, but as much as i know im happy and i hope others understand me. i love being like this, not actually thinking of how others may think and maybe being around her makes me a little less coward, i dont want to use the word brave coz am still not. but now i can show half of the real me. i even told my friends about how i feel and they did agree that i look happier now and because of that, they still love me, and so i thank them for that.

i love being me, i don't know how long but one thing's for sure, i love you, and i'd be more than happy to spend my last year with you, dont get me wrong, last year in college. thanks.